Tuesday 16 May 2017

Balancing The Scales Of Mental Health

Tipping the balance of mental health , tipping the balance of mental health can occur if the odds you feel are stacked against you . And you'd think that being told that my teaching assistant job being restructured that this would happen , I was only told yesterday and currently I am galloping through the various emotions of disbelief , tears , upset and anger . There is nothing to be done it is part of the modern way of things and budgets and restructuring are sadly a way and fact of life.

But though I am losing my job as teaching assistant and it's a job I have truly loved I have to get knuckle down and look for something else to make up the shortfall. I did walk to school today alright not 100 % but ok hoping it together that was until I reached near my school and then I got upset . I know I will continue to get upset but it will lessen and  at the moment I feel as I have no energy .

I don't feel the same as I did when I had my breakdown , yes it is a bit of a struggle to get motivated but I was only told the news yesterday about losing my job. I feel that documenting my feelings help me through it and will enable me to cope , I am stronger that I ever was even tough depression and anxiety will always be apart of me it is going to get control of me at this moment at time . I am keeping one step ahead and the difference is this time I have more a support network in place and I am very much sharing everything with colleagues even the cat , cats are very good listeners except when they turn their back on you and escape through the catflap.

I feel a bit lost which is rather like trying to tidy up after a toddler you never quite get it sorted , but eventually you do as they learn to tidy up for themselves .

But I will come through it , I will find my way again ...


  1. I'm so sorry to read this, I'm glad that you have people around you to talk to xx

  2. Sorry to hear this. I'm not keen on schools either!It is a shock be kind to yourself and punch the silly bugger responsible for the restructuring!


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