Tuesday 16 May 2017

Balancing The Scales Of Mental Health

Tipping the balance of mental health , tipping the balance of mental health can occur if the odds you feel are stacked against you . And you'd think that being told that my teaching assistant job being restructured that this would happen , I was only told yesterday and currently I am galloping through the various emotions of disbelief , tears , upset and anger . There is nothing to be done it is part of the modern way of things and budgets and restructuring are sadly a way and fact of life.

But though I am losing my job as teaching assistant and it's a job I have truly loved I have to get knuckle down and look for something else to make up the shortfall. I did walk to school today alright not 100 % but ok hoping it together that was until I reached near my school and then I got upset . I know I will continue to get upset but it will lessen and  at the moment I feel as I have no energy .


I don't feel the same as I did when I had my breakdown , yes it is a bit of a struggle to get motivated but I was only told the news yesterday about losing my job. I feel that documenting my feelings help me through it and will enable me to cope , I am stronger that I ever was even tough depression and anxiety will always be apart of me it is going to get control of me at this moment at time . I am keeping one step ahead and the difference is this time I have more a support network in place and I am very much sharing everything with colleagues even the cat , cats are very good listeners except when they turn their back on you and escape through the catflap.

I feel a bit lost which is rather like trying to tidy up after a toddler you never quite get it sorted , but eventually you do as they learn to tidy up for themselves .

But I will come through it , I will find my way again ...

2 comments:

  1. I'm so sorry to read this, I'm glad that you have people around you to talk to xx

    ReplyDelete
  2. Sorry to hear this. I'm not keen on schools either!It is a shock be kind to yourself and punch the silly bugger responsible for the restructuring!

    ReplyDelete

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